Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Dear Men, Just Listen

Long, long ago when great mastodons roamed the earth...

Woman: That saber-tooth tiger is really bothering me. He scares the kids and he keeps eating our meat!

Man: I go kill. KILL!


Modern time...

Woman: My boss is really bothering me. He never listens to what I say and he doesn't pay me enough.

Man: I go kill. KILL!

Lets face it...


Men have not evolved in how they approach women's problems. I'm not saying that I don't appreciate the cave-man desire to kill something and bring it back to us as a prize. That's very thoughtful. What I'm saying is that we no longer need you to kill our problems. Listening is the perfect alternative.

Men want to solve a woman's problems before she's even done describing them. That's nice, but most of the time, all we want is someone to listen and be sympathetic.

Important Hint: If we want help we will say "please help me...." or "what do you think I should do about..."

In the future after all men have read this blog...


Woman: Betsy keeps making fun of me because she has purple skin and three more eyes than I have.

Man: I go ki- I mean, I'm sorry honey, that really sucks, want me to bring you some ice cream?

Woman: Ice cream would be great, but maybe later. The fact that you were so sensitive and sympathetic was so hot that all I want to do is have mad, passionate sex. Right now.

See what I did there? I'm letting men know that they will get sex in return for being awesome. Let the revolution begin.

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